Session 17 Debrief: The Arrival of Instinct

Three days ago, on a Friday night, the boys and I were brainstorming about my next driving session. Considering February is a black month (because there aren’t any official holidays), the men were busy throughout the entire weekend.

There was a faint agreement for a slot of 1100 hours on Saturday, but nothing was set in stone.

I took it upon myself to execute a solo session. In the recent past, I drove the car by myself, albeit it occurred in the early morning and late night when the traffic was low, but it was enough to give me confidence.

Due to personal indecisiveness, I thought to wake up early and get the session done. The alarm rang at about 0445 hours. However, the scared voice in my head persuaded me to wait until 1100 hours to go out with friends.

As the hours rolled by, it was evident that no one was free at the time. My anxiety skyrocketed because a lot of hours on a Saturday were lost on fidgeting about the timing of the practice session.

Finally, I determined to do it alone after eating lunch. The plan was to go on a familiar route at around 1300 hours to avoid heavy traffic as most people would be having lunch.

I was wrong.

Session 17 Recap

The clock said 1243 hours when I started the engine after lunch. Unfortunately, that was one hour too early for most people in India.

1. A Terrifying Start

Right in front of my parking spot, a charitable organization was feeding the homeless who were seated on the damned street. The very first challenge for a noob driver existed right at the start of the practice session. I squeezed past them.

For obvious reasons, my heart was racing. Nothing crazy, but definitely more than a chill, resting pace.

Things turned for the worse when I ran into traffic. Not traffic, per se. A large vehicle was negotiating a corner on the main street. Others had to wait until the maneuver was completed to get going.

I stalled. Twice.

My ticker was probably doing 150-180 bpm at the moment. My mind was screaming different variations of “I am wrecked” and “this was a bad idea” for good measure. The onlookers were giving me nasty side-eyes.

Thankfully, it didn’t cause a traffic jam and people drove around me (while giving the side-eyes).

After I got going, I was praying to god like a drug dealer on trial for little or no traffic. God did the opposite.

2. Tight Spaces, No Escape

A few hundred meters ahead of the spot where I messed up, I merged with bumper-to-bumper traffic. I glanced left and right and there was literally nowhere to turn to park. The only option was to thug it out.

You can only move a few inches at a time when you are trapped in traffic. It was challenging due to my recent stalling issue that tanked my confidence. 

The plan was to engage the clutch a bit and then rev the engine to prevent the reverse roll of the car on uneven terrain and engage the clutch further to keep moving forward. When it came to stopping the car, I had to slam the brakes because the last thing I wanted was to rear-end someone ahead.

Of course, I ran the risk of getting rear-ended myself. Fortunately, the ‘L’ taped on my rear windshield informed the driver behind me that I was still learning. It is quite likely that he maintained a healthy distance.

A few minutes later, I was in second-gear traffic. This was good because my steering skills and spatial awareness were great. Then, third-gear traffic arrived and I was even happier.

The happiness was short-lived as I encountered another dense traffic after a mile. This was worse than the initial one as the road was narrower and folks were coming from all directions.

I used the same ‘trick’ to keep the engine alive while going up the incline through bumper-to-bumper traffic. Engage the clutch a bit, rev the engine, and use the clutch to control the pace. 

Worked beautifully. 

Yes, I slammed the damned brakes and blasted the horn as necessary.

This was the end of the terrible part of the driving session. To be honest, the only terrible part was the couple of back-to-back stalls in the middle of the street at the beginning of the test run.

I had to pull over to the side after clearing that area to gather my thoughts. I verbally calmed myself down as my bloodstream was filled with adrenaline and cortisol.

3. Drive for Water

The session after my cooldown minute involved driving up to a place where me and the boys stop for cigarettes (for them) and tea (for me) to get some water. As mentioned earlier, I had lunch before the start of the session and the stressful traffic conditions were dehydrating.

I guzzled down 500ml of the best drink in the world and got going again. A few miles later, the phone rang and I ignored it. Some time later I pulled over to the side and checked the missed call. It was one of the boys.

I returned the call to discover they were free at about 1530 hours for a ride. It was about 1320 then. My plan was to drive a bit further, but judging I had to return and calm myself down before riding along with the boys (I didn’t plan on driving with them), I chose to return.

4. The Return Trip

It was smooth. I refuelled. Encountered some tricky traffic as usual. I guess the city, after becoming a haven for tourists, doesn’t really have a low-traffic hour. 

There were plenty of instances that were challenging. For example, there was a moment when a stray dog came onto the road, necessitating me to lift and coast for a bit. Similarly, an autorickshaw stopped right in front of me, in the middle of the road, to unload passengers.

Additionally, there were large vehicles like buses and tractors which required careful maneuverability.

All of them were executed well. Overcoming the fear in the first half of the session paid off.

I neared home and was feeling better than ever. Interestingly, I nailed the parking. This time, the gap between the wall and my car was even narrower. This was a great feeling as I wanted to pull it off for a while.

Winning the Battle Within

It’s been a few months since I’ve been pushing myself to the limit. 

Simultaneously, there were many internal demons that had to be dealt with. External pressure from my ‘loved’ ones made things more interesting. Simply put, it’s been a grind and it’s still going on.

One of the key elements that keep me motivated is these little wins. 

Yes, in the grand tapestry of the cosmos, a guy in his late 20s taking a car through stretches of busy traffic isn’t that impressive. In fact, it’s comical considering I was the last one in my friend group to do it.

However, a variety of other incidents leading up to that moment make it special. For instance, before January 10th of this year, I had never sat in the driver’s seat. Within the next 40-ish days, I purchased a new car, got my driver’s license, and became a decent pilot.

Furthermore, I did it all without skipping a day of workout, discarding my diet plan, or neglecting my content creation efforts. There were many days when I felt tired and broken due to the lack of any immediate wins, but I kept going.

This driving session represented that.

It represented resilience. It showed that regardless of the mountain in front, I won’t give up. It proved that I can and will do whatever it takes to get the job done. It demonstrated emotional control and the power of my mind.

So, yeah, it was a great session.

Looking Forward: A Morning Drive, Perhaps

The session was rough at certain sections but overall it does represent a crucial milestone in my driver’s journey. It won’t be the worst idea in the world to take things easily for the foreseeable future while I focus on creating content.

I can surely conduct morning sessions and drive through narrow streets to get the feel of different kinds of terrain and road conditions. It also seems plausible to get the boys on board with that strategy too.

Additionally, it will give me confidence because I will pick the boys up myself and drop them home after the session is wrapped up.

Either way, I will think about it when I think about it.

For now, as the 2025 Formula 1 season comes closer, I must channel my energy in that direction. Moreover, I have planned another book on content writing for my website to run my marketing experiments to kickstart my consulting career. 

The next months will be gruelling. Thankfully, that’s what I live for.

Until next time,

Tara

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Next Chapter: Session 18 Debrief: First Clean Run

Previous Chapter: Session 16 Debrief: Refuelled at Night

Index (with Prologue): The Path to Driving License